“

“My great-grandmother was murdered by her schizophrenic son because he thought she was the Devil.”

“

Is it Saturday yet? HELP.

“

This year Cinco de Mayo falls on a Saturday and your plans for the day are not solidified. On one of the most glorious drinking days of the year, your options are widespread and precarious. While Cinco de Mayo is a recipe for fun, it is also as some say about St. Patrick’s Day, “amateur hour.” It could be super fun or it could go all wrong. Thought Catalog’s second Choose Your Own Adventure inside!

“

AV Concepts built a realistic “hologram” version of the rapper. As cool as the technology is, I have to say I’m in the minority here: the whole thing creeped me out.

“

Cinco De Mayo is here! Which means what exactly? I’m not entirely sure. Hmm, good question. Gee, I’m coming up empty on this one. Oh wait, I got it! It means you’ll be very drunk tonight. And full of Mexican food. Yes, Mexico’s independence means you have an obligation to get wasted and eat burritos.