“

If they’re not trying to make you spend ridiculous amounts of money on technology, gadgets and other miscellaneous goods, they’re robbing you of your hard-earned cash right in front of your eyes. Who are they?

“

He’s ridiculously romantic, ridiculously early.

“

April 1, 2004: Oprah Winfrey becomes the fourth member of the Holy Trinity.

“

All you need to do to publish a best-selling book is take a selfie of your foot. Seriously.

“

I would like to tell you about the biggest lie in book publishing.

“

Education is supposed to be the key to freedom, but it has been nothing but a heavy chain preventing me from achieving any sense of financial independence.

“

Whenever you are approached by a stranger in any way, consider it a possible scam.

“

Here’s my strategy for buying a used car on Craigslist (or from any private buyer).

“

Girls Gone Wild spent upwards of $20 million annually in direct-response marketing, mainly in late night 30-minute infomercials, whose demographic were idle middle-aged men near the end of their libido watching television at 2:00 a.m.

“

Most importantly, make sure to avoid including glimpses of your crusty apartment in the background of these images. Your potential buyer will not want to know that you use your dresser as a surrogate bar or that you haven’t changed your sheets nor made your bed in four weeks. Or, you know, just snap a photo with your iPhone of the dresser where it is.