A make out session is only as good as the music playing in the background.
Bubble bath with rose petals in the water and Sade on the iPod. Corny but efficient.
The hardest part about doing a striptease (no puns, people) is choosing the right soundtrack. Here are 33 songs that will get you to rip those pants off, fast!
Joanna Newsom is nice to listen to at 2 a.m. when you’re busy feeling things and want to freak out your roommate, but she’s not appropriate sex music. Her voice kind of sounds like your mom screaming at you to come inside for dinner or something. “RYAN! COME INSIDE AND EAT! THE FOOD IS GETTING COLD!”
Best Coast’s Crazy For You is the perfect sex record for twee couples who aren’t actually that sexual. They just like to stare in each other’s eyes and play with the buttons on their cardigans and make out and do some heavy petting.
If I’m getting fucked in the ass, I need to know way in advance so I can prepare properly. The guy needs to send me a private Facebok event invitation titled, “Ryan O’Connell gets fucked in the ass.” with a set date and time.
I’ve been with this girl for the last few months and she’s pretty awesome. She doesn’t take any shit, she makes me laugh and she has an amazing body. Our sex life is pretty phenomenal too except for one major detail. She NEVER gives me head. One night, she grazed the tip with her tongue, but then quickly got out of there. What’s the issue?