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The more enjoyable and relatable you find La La Land, the whiter you are. And if you ever meet anybody who tells you it’s their favorite movie? Yeah, it’s pretty much a lock they secretly want you and everybody who looks like you ethnically cleansed.

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This movie is not about rooting for the collapse of the American (and world) economy. What this movie is about is rooting for the exposure of corruption.

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Ed Sheeran: He maintains serious eye contact while harmonizing with your orgasm.

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We love high school movies for their comedy and relatable conflicts, but we often get too wrapped up in the same aesthetics portrayed in every plot.

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Fancy having beautiful women chasing a relationship with you? Want them obsessing over your every word like you’re Noah from The Notebook? It only takes four simple steps.

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Maybe he saw how unbelievably hot he looked in Gangster Squad last year and knew that he really had a moral obligation to procreate.

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Ladies, I know you’re scared. I know what it feels like to lose all hope, especially when it comes to love. But I’m here to tell you that everything will be okay. I’m here to tell you that your fantasies are just as attainable as ever.

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If you loved The Notebook…you won’t be let down.

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Also, nobody will ever love you.

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I needed a haircut. That’s how it all started.