“This creepy face in between my great-grandparents’ heads.”
“Playing with kittens makes you instantly forget about loneliness.”
“Oh gosh the news girl, Jodi Huisentruit has always haunted me…where is her body? Why hasn’t it been found? Sad. And why are there no suspects?”
“I waited until we were both 30, then let him serve me at Burger King.”
“Consciously drowning. Imagine being totally awake and aware of your faculties, hopelessly stuck underwater, and having to convince yourself to breathe in or pass out.”
“You’d better pray to God that’s bigger than a .38 or I’m gonna beat you to death while I bleed out.”
“Live, laugh, love.” Translation: Worship at my feet or I’ll put your cat in the blender.
“There are no good women left.” Well, then, GTFO this site, then.
“He spiked my drink himself so he could ‘save me’ and show me how caring he was.”
“I say, ‘I’m falling for you.’ She says, ‘I can’t catch you.’”