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You’ll remember how the washer works. You’ll spend time with friends and family. You won’t wear sweatpants. You’ll have resting happy face.

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Besides boring you all with technical details about prescription drugs, I wanted to repeatedly hit my main point home for you: Pills aren’t all that bad.

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These things I’ve thought defining traits of my personality, and my own great failings, listed as symptoms to an identifiable disorder. A treatable condition.

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I crack a pill in half and let it slide down my throat with some blue Gatorade. And just like that, I’m back.

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You’d think someone who takes Adderall everyday, like myself, would maybe have at least some sort of idea of what an Adderall high is like. Nope. Not a clue.

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Could your prescription meds land you behind bars?

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Antidepressants are too often used as a quick fix to mask symptoms of a bigger problem that you’re just too lazy or scared to take charge of.

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We took them for fun. We took them to study. It was normal, doctors said it was OK and so did our parents. (8mg of klonopin, 20mg time-released adderall, oxycontin post-wisdom-teeth).