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When you’re meeting a guy, what do you look for first? Nice style? Toned arms? At least a full set of teeth?

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1. Pick your nose. It will bleed.

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13. Bottled water.

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After this pedicure, I’m really going to start saving and do my own nails.

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7. Stare at them incredulously.

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Her nails were long – like really long – and pointy, very very pointy. They looked like daggers – except fake daggers, press-on daggers…but daggers nonetheless.

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3. Find out about cool parties; ask friends, “Are you going?”

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Snapchat was totally made for the moments when you do something new with your nails and have to show your friends like, right now right now.

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See if you can listen to every Beatles song in a row. Do not skip Octopus’ Garden. DO NOT SKIP OCTOPUS’ GARDEN.