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Fact: Darth Vader never actually said, “Luke, I am your father.”

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I wonder if Dina Lohan ever wakes up (in the house that Lindsay’s Freaky Friday money bought her) and thinks to herself, “Oops. I kind of messed up on the whole “being a mom” thing.” After all, you don’t get to be like Lindsay Lohan without getting a little bit of help.

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But Betty’s logic is so limited in scope that the only conclusion she seems capable of coming to is that if it’s not one man, it must be another. In other words, Betty is a woman who might quite adamantly argue that all fish necessarily need bicycles. She just has it all wrong.