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2. Spooning leads to forking… so keep your silverware to yourself unless you mean it!

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Rappers are starting to sound less like they’re bragging and more like they’re listing their tax write offs.

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Comedian Mike Birbiglia once went sleeprunning out a second story window. He now sleeps in a sleeping bag with mittens on his hands so he can’t unzip his nightly cocoon. He has to protect himself from himself before nodding off.