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It’s startling to hear that there is a link between testicular cancer and smoking pot, especially if you have been smoking your whole life.

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“Your mom is so ugly, she went into a haunted house and left with a job application.”

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I think about how fragile human dignity is, how easily it can slip away, and I grow cautious. I must be careful not to let myself drown in these greasy, delicious waters.

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In most cases, a prisoner’s “special meal” isn’t actually his last; the meal comes earlier because evidence has shown that inmates’ appetites tend to wane in the days before their executions. That never made sense to me until I thought about what it means to die.

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Perhaps the seminal depression food, Letting Go and eating a Cinnabon is perhaps one of the most saturated-fat- and chemically-induced consolations you can achieve after your self-loathing has reached incalculable highs…