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“If we kick every Latino out of this country, who is going to be cleaning your toilets, Donald Trump?”

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Lady Gaga’s first words were “I can’t wait to have a gay son so we can go shopping together!”

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If she is fat, I can’t help but think, what does that make me? What does that make the vast majority of women?

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Watching Beyonce and her two back-up dancers prance around in midriff-baring Santa outfits as they pile crap into their shopping cart is consumerism at its most direct and hilarious. But, wait! The lyrics! You can tell this song was made in the early ’00s by the types of gifts they want their boyfriends to get them.

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Poor Kim Richards — she never can seem to catch a break, can she? Unlucky in love and in and out of rehab, she’s a sad tragic figure who spends her daze clutching old photographs from her child star days and throwing martini glasses at the gardner.

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Before Pink made her second album, Mizzundastood, she was known as an R & B singer. Do you remember that? Because I try really hard not to. Anyway, Pink was clearly like, “I hate R & B and I’m not black, LaFace, so I’m going to do something different.”