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Breaking Bad’s Bryan Cranston as Dr. Tim Whatley, Jerry and Kramer’s dentist.

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And although Bob Saget isn’t an insult comic, I still get insulted when people call him a comic.

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Although the internet loves Ryan Gosling and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, I firmly believe that Anderson Cooper is the perfect man. What more could you possibly want?

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“Did you know that if you skinned Larry King & ironed out his leather, you could make enough coats to give 1 to every poor child in America?”

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My earliest memory of Eminem is from the sixth grade, where an older girl played me his Slim Shady LP in our bunk beds at space camp. (I go hard, guys.)

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You are an old-school Bravo fan who loves watching fallen stars get high on camera. Hey Paula — a short-lived reality show that followed around a completely stoned Paula Abdul—is the real life version of The Comeback.

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But although I will be ready to scream a strident “I told you so” when Taylor Lautner announces he’s quitting “acting” for gay porn, this cannot be your path. You will stay in that closet with Tom Cruise, and you will like it.

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Bitches always think they’re so funny. Whenever they say something that was kind of screwed up, they’ll quickly be like, “That wasn’t bitchy. I was just making a joke!” Well, guess what? Your joke wasn’t funny. It was just bitchy, and bitchy does not always translate to hilarity!