A couple of years ago I bought one of those super-cheap magic wands off of some shady website. I got it and tested it out, it started getting pretty warm while I was doing my thing, but I wasn’t exactly paying much attention. After I was done I went to the bathroom and saw I had a huge burn on the left side of my upper thigh and lady bits.
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A few months ago, I went to go see The Lion King 3D with a few of my friends at the theatre. After the credits started to roll, I started to make my way down the stairs but it was so dark that I fell backwards on my ass. The woman behind me started laughing so hard, she began to cry.