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Home is where you left everything you knew. It’s where your little sister is going to her first dance and you are not there to help her with her hair or makeup.

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“I got so proud that I was able to make a noose, I also decided to make some homemade ice cream.”

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Cookie Dough Ice Cream: You are resourceful and crafty. Your home is filled with DIY projects you found on Pinterest, and you’re always throwing low-budget parties for your friends.

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This is such a sweet story!

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“I ate eight full meals, half a sheet of brownies, pie, dates, and then asked my wife to pick me up a soda.”

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Donald Trump: New York Super Fudge Chunk. Because obviously, Trump is New York. But have you ever actually seen someone order this?

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This can be the start of an EDM concert.

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Summer has me daydreaming about my childhood; lightening bugs that glow and sparklers that excite and amusement parks that feature crazy rides and log flumes and firecracker popsicles that drip down my mouth in the messiest of fashions.

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Ben and Jerry’s may be the best, most perfectly rounded and satisfying product in all of America and it deserves our constant praise.

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Why am I here? Will this be a good thing or a difficult thing? Will life, in the end?