When you wake up, your hair has managed to get in your mouth, trying to suffocate you.
When does Denzel Washington have to hang out with the Rugrats? Potty Training Day.
What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? Autotuna.
What did the farmer say when he lost one of his cows? What a miss-steak.
What did the squid say when it was asked out on a date? I’ll ink about it.
What is a man’s idea of a balanced diet? A Budweiser in each hand!
What do frogs do with paper? Rip-it.
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s? A Frosty.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken? A poultry-geist.
What did the bottled water tell the spy? The names bond, Hydrogen bond.