You mistake it for love, because you have found comfort in knowing someone is just as destructive as you are. You mistake it for love, because you have not yet learned what love really is.
healing from toxicity
Shaping yourself into someone others might not quickly recognize.
Every person around you was able to see how unhealthy this was for you. Everyone in your life knew how bad things had gotten.
The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety, it’s connection. The same is true for anxiety. Anxiety is being disconnected from the present moment, other people, or yourself.
This me accepting that a heart that is broken is still worthy of love.
The fact is, you will never be the person you were again.
Healing is a reminder that nothing was ever strong enough to break you.
The experiences that people are forced to deal with, helps to form them into the person that they are.
Ask yourself: which moments am I romanticizing? Which moments am I forgetting? I’ll bet that if you look closely, you won’t just remember those romantic trips and dates, but also the crazymaking arguments preceding them. If you reevaluate all those times they bought you flowers and gifts, you’ll also remember the countless times you cried yourself to sleep, trying to get them to understand your point of view.
You don’t play.