“

5. Don’t recognize it? Don’t eat it.

“

Flashes on the horizon, followed by ominous booms. What the hell was that? Thunder? Artillery fire? The beginning of the end? Real or hallucination? It was too much.

“

But on the other hand, if you confess to never having even tried weed, people are usually going to give you the general response of “Never? Not even once? And you’re not even curious!?”

“

I’ve tried smoking a couple times, but it never clicked with me like other people. Veteran smokers would watch me inhale and say, “It’s not a breathalyzer test. Don’t suck on it like a helium balloon. You don’t need to puff out your cheeks like a chipmunk. Have you ever seen someone smoke? Like on TV?”

“

With summer thrashing upon us in rays as searing as solar stalactites, many of us are forgoing our weatherbeaten copies of Infinite Jest and our local coffee shop haunts for a breezy cycling journey through the verdant landscape…