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Your favorite moment in life is when people cancel plans. There’s nothing quite like that sweet sigh of relief when you don’t have to hang out with your friends.

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Unlike college, he did not forget my existence after that night, and for the next two weeks my phone was bombarded with text message after text message.

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Posts that are cross-posted from your Twitter/Pinterest/Vine — if we wanted to see these things, we would be following you on these platforms.

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Because I’m afraid you’ll ask me for the sweater back which I have strategically stolen. But you can’t be mad at me for this; it fits perfectly and keeps me extremely warm on the semi-frequent nights where my heater doesn’t work.