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I see her decision to go out with friends, to lunch with a male work acquaintance, to knit, to sleep with her back to me as meaningful, as a statement about me.

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Habit has a way of breaking down, especially as you age.

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Problematic? Yes.

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“You could always go to law school!”

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Anyone who likes David Sedaris is automatically good people. If you catch him reading Amy Sedaris, though, you marry him.

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Lacan: “You probably can’t understand anything I say.”

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I have a friend who considers not owning books a major red flag and another who describes her ideal guy as “someone she can read in bed with on a Sunday.”

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This chick last night just described ‘Spring Breakers’ as white ‘Belly’ which sounds pretty good. I pointed out ‘Gummo’ was on the TV at DMX’s house in ‘Belly.’ The conversation was not as boring as I’m making it sound.

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Surveillance, as a kind of spooky, invisible power that is both inescapable and everywhere, makes us behave and protect ourselves from the law, even when there’s no visible threat of getting caught.

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30. Carry a bag from a designer store as your everyday tote. I know your lunch is not from Yves Saint Laurent because those people don’t eat, so I don’t know why you just pulled a salad up out of that bitch.