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Make a joke after a few moments of peace, one of those jokes that isn’t funny because of its sharp wit, but funny because it’s a comment on our current state, designed to make both of us ease further into the bubble of each other that we’re currently floating in. You could say something about how I’m as pale as the sheets, or how your pet is staring at us from the corner, or how the lady upstairs is walking like an elephant. And we’ll laugh together.
“Hi, I’m Chilly Gonzales. If you don’t know me, I’m a Grammy-nominated producer. I hold the Guinness world record for longest continuous piano concert at 27 hours. I’ve got a lot of famous friends.” He pauses for effect, then, “In France, where I live, they call me un génie musicale.”