Latest Ew Articles

I Don't Know How To Network

I Don't Know How To Network

Avatar Ryan O'Connell

I feel like a used car salesman whenever I try to make contacts. Whenever someone gives me their card within two minutes of meeting me, it’s as if I’ve been fondled inappropriately from underneath the table. I feel silly because I have nothing to give them in return (business cards were made for me months ago but I never picked them up because I can’t bring myself to be on that Patrick Bateman tip) so I just smile politely and make plans for a follow-up, which usually never happens.

When Will People Stop Being So Ridiculous?

When Will People Stop Being So Ridiculous?

Avatar Ryan O'Connell

“People are ridiculous!” is something I say almost daily because it’s true. They are. And you know where the most ridiculous of the bunch go to congregate and bask in their mutual ridiculousness? Los Angeles, duh! I’ve been here for almost three weeks because of the holidays and for other reasons that aren’t even that clear to me. I don’t mind it too much though because it means I get front row tickets to the Douchebag Show every day.