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“A shaving-cream can. Value size.”

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“Had a patient come in with a coconut up his ass.”

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Please do not view these pictures if you have a weak stomach.

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“A flashlight was shining out of the fellow’s orifice.”

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“My buddy’s dad had a couple came in where they both had genital piercings and while mid-intercourse, their piercings interlocked. They came in stuck together.”

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I feel emotionally exhausted. Not because of my long wait or relatively simple procedure, but because of the raw humanity. The humanity I work so hard to compartmentalize and hide away.

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I was a bad mother.

“

Like what Natalie Portman said, “You give me premature ventricular contractions.” Dating someone from the medical field will really make your heart skip a beat, both in a good and bad way.