CHEESE FRIES: “Insanely good” and “cheap” but “offset” by the fact that you will “inevitably” throw it all up in “less than an hour wait.”
He only wants you when he’s drunk. When he’s lonely and hates the idea of crawling into bed alone.
Be careful, because you don’t want one drunken night to ruin the rest of your life.
Aries: You’re the drunk friend who also gets everyone else drunk AF because you’re constantly buying rounds of shots or challenging everyone to chugging contests you know you’ll win.
There’s this guy who broke my heart. We don’t talk anymore, but sometimes I send him messages when I get home at 4 a.m. and the room feels like it’s spinning and I am so, so sad for reasons I can’t comprehend. He never texts me back and I convince myself he changed his number.
Our words spewing out the truth,
No protection of mental capability to process things.
Never have I ever drank an entire bottle of wine by myself.
Sagittarius: On the PROWL. You’re a flirtatious drunk and always looking for someone to make out with.
Long gone are late nights spent chasing a “good time,” losing my phone in bar bathrooms, being the wobbly chick your friend has to prop up against a wall, throwing up in corners and waking up in strangers’ beds.
I didn’t sleep brilliantly that night, I never do when I’ve been drinking, but when I woke up I was completely sober.