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No matter what I did, you were never happy. There was always room for improvement. You told me that I needed to be perfect, and it wasn’t until I starved myself to near death that I realized that the only way I could be perfect is if I was dead.

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I got up early and went for a run. Ok, I went for a jog. Well, really I jogged some of it and walked some. Alright fine. I pretty much strolled. Cut me a break. I gave it a shot. Running is hard.

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A passion for healthy eating and working out evolved into an obsession with numbers and goals that slowly began to take over my life.

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When you first start dating someone, it can be easy to overlook personality flaws. But eventually the relationship reaches its boiling point where the person’s asshole qualities can no longer be ignored/tolerated.

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I, for one, feel that people who ask if you’re aware of how fattening your order of onion rings probably is deserve to be shot out of a cannon into the mouth of a volcano.