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I saw myself the way everyone else did. I was not Indonesian. I was born and raised in Jakarta but growing up, I had subconsciously shunned every single aspect of my country’s culture and history in favor of America’s. I became an honorary American without realizing it.
I had no plans to be rushed to the hospital that evening after I vomited blood in the library. I had no plans to spend that entire night in the emergency room, then the rest of that week in the hospital because my hemoglobin levels kept decreasing. I had no plans to need my stomach to be stapled to stop the bleeding, and I certainly had no plans to receive a blood transfusion.