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Virgo: Teaching everyone the proper form for doing a jello shot.

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12. Capricorn: HAHAHAHHAA. Nah.

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Scorpio: Rough

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Capricorn: The one who drank more than everyone else yet somehow remembers everything.

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Oh, Capricorn is last?

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Aries: Learn to slow the fuck down and listen to both your heart and your mind. There is wisdom within both of these entities, and finding the balance between the two will lead you to success, or at least peace of mind. 

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Cancer: Loving.

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Sagittarius: Hungover.