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“There’s good and bad ones, I think. Really tiny ones are weird-looking. I enjoy a hefty avocado-sized sack visually, I suppose.”

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8. Your cute voice was still cute.

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9. Snot Bubbles

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I don’t care if he’s bringing home the foreskin. I don’t care about any of this because we are not obsessed as a culture with making sure men’s bits look like something made for a Bratz doll.

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After all, the only thing more aesthetically pleasing than a formless, wrinkled sack of flesh is a hairless, formless, wrinkled sack of flesh.

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According to the Cleveland Clinic, a non-profit, academic medical center in Ohio, this month the number of vasectomies will go up 50%. The increase is related to a sporting event known as “March Madness,” which is a month long college basketball tournament.

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As you may already know, the Internet is full of sick and terrifying things. Now, there are two more gems you can add to that list.