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Middle names. People made middle names and then didn’t tell others what it was because in order to put a curse on someone you need their full name. If someone has a legal middle name and you don’t know it then you can’t curse them.

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ARIES: DON’T take that job offer. It might seems like a great opportunity, and sure, it’s a LOT more money, but do you really want to move away to a state that smells like cow manure just for a little extra cash?

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Spoiler Alert: It’s not that bad, and in every case there’s a happy ending!

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I haven’t been able to look at my pussy for days. It’s reminding me of…him. I couldn’t wear mittens when Troy took me to the indoor ice-skating rink, cuz, well, they remind me of what he did to me.

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I’m not suggesting that we dedicate our lives to focusing on the things that bring us down, but I do think we have every right to feel bad about our lives’ misfortunes every now and then. It will help us heal from them.