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For what is arguably the most diminutive item of clothing, the collar paradoxically holds more weight and meaning than perhaps any other sartorial choice.

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The cool thing about these guys, though, is that they’re simple in just the ways my chandelier earrings of yore weren’t.

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The phrase “stay warm” is not something I take lightly. The cheerful and often lighthearted way in which it’s uttered belies the effort it takes to actually stay warm. Effort and…cash.

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Before you reach down to cuff your pants – don’t. Just…don’t, OK?

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1. La Moda UK. They specialize in shoes — particularly simple yet clunky shoes and sandals, with a bit of iridescence thrown into the mix. Their style of footwear resembles that of Marques Almeida, except with affordable price points.

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10. Freak out completely when you find something seriously awesome in the 70 PERCENT OFF bin. On ASOS, that means it’s like $3.

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Pro: No one can see the real, human you as you sit on the couch clipping your toe nails and stuffing your face with Doritos and Cool Whip while you dutifully sift through 44 pages of NEW ARRIVALS!!