Someone is yelling. Behind the microphone is a squat man standing in front of a banner. His voice moves between the vociferations of an angry, tired lecturer, and the squeal of a jet turbine. He stands in front of a snaking insignia, a design clearly interested in evoking the swastika. People are clapping at every interval. The speaker waddles like an upside-down pendulum, taking secretly heavy breaths.
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It’s pretty safe to say that any quote someone would suggest to me as being ‘inspirational,’ ‘motivational,’ or ‘uplifting’ would warrant an eye roll, but here are a few that absolutely make me cringe when they appear in my newsfeed as a Facebook status. My sincere apologies if you have one of these as a wall decal in your living room.
Let me begin by saying that my employers have not particularly seduced me with my salary, whose compensatory effects are less than enthralling. Put simply, I get paid just enough to pay whatever the hell bills wind up in my mailbox, and if I’m lucky, at the end of the month, I can get the 16 year Scotch instead of the 12 year. Yes, I am into 16-year-olds; I hear that’s legal in France.