I can’t help this chemical imbalance. I can’t make it go away. So it’s true, I’d be a completely different person without my anxiety. I’d be brighter and shinier, like brand new shoes from DSW. I’d be so vibrant.
Our brains are hurricanes of ‘what ifs’. Our minds are miles and miles of questions. Of unanswered messages. Of cancelations. Of suspicion. Of losing control.
People with anxiety don’t back down. We don’t stop. We don’t give up. Even when we have three panic attacks in a row. Even when we have to go to the ER just for someone to convince us that we aren’t dying. Even when we have to change medications over and over again.
Having other people voice concern about your mental and emotional health makes your panic spin out of control. For them to see your struggle and see what you have to go through every day just to get through life is terrifying for you. You would rather save them from seeing you like that.
It honestly breaks my little heart and causes the bricks to be stacks quicker on my burdened chest. My anxiety grows ten fold and the sickening voice inside my head won’t shut up. It’s like all that matters in my life is grey. And muted.
We become incredibly attached. Once time has passed, and we are in a committed relationship, we become attached and clingy. Why? Because our anxiety tells us this relationship is temporary.
I need for anxiety not to control my entire life. I need for myself to be stronger.
Your bed is your safe haven. No one can hurt you there. No one can bother you. No one has to see if you’re in a terrible state or mood. Your bed is the only place where you can be your true self.
You could be out with your girls for happy hour, or kicking back on a Sunday watching football with your best friends, when suddenly your heart beats at a scary rate, and you feel like you’re going to be sick. It’s really terrifying to experience this, especially when it seems to be coming out of nowhere.
Anxiety makes me feel like I can never say ‘yes’ to plans. It overwhelms me with to do lists and unchecked boxes in my brain that tell me that I can never relax. It’s always making me sprint to the finish line, and run until my legs go numb.