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You Cannot Be The Peace For Someone Who Is At War With Themselves

Have you ever tried to save someone that wasn’t making an effort to save themselves?

If like me, you are someone who has gone through a lot of trials in their lifetime, this often causes you to develop a tremendous level of empathy and compassion for others who are hurting.

It is wonderful to have the desire to help people.

It is the right thing to help others when we can.

Jesus wants us to be His hands and feet to the hurting and the broken.

But hear me out when I say you CANNOT be someone’s peace, otherwise they learn to rely on you instead of God.

You CANNOT fix someone who isn’t willing to look in the mirror and consider what actions, what choices, and what mistakes they have made that led them to be in a place they don’t want to be in.

You CANNOT allow someone to lean on you so hard and for so long that you become a permanent crutch.

You are doing them a disservice to not give them the opportunities to test out their own wobbly legs and stretch their faith.

You CANNOT make someone happy by letting them steal your joy.

Imagine someone had an anchor tied to their ankle. As they were sinking, you threw them a flotation device, but they rejected the way you tried to save them and insisted that you tie your anchor to theirs so you could both go down together, when right within their reach there was a perfectly able way that they could save themselves. Would you do it?

Probably not, right?

This is what trying to be someone’s source of peace is like when they are at war with themselves.

It can only come from within themselves and from Jesus, and all your efforts to save them when they aren’t happy with their life and themselves and their choices will simply steal your peace, joy and happiness.

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Writer & Life Coach Follow Tabitha on Instagram or read more articles from Tabitha on Thought Catalog.

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