Spotted a cute guy but can’t tell if he likes you? On the second date, but unsure if he’s playing footsie or is just another hostile weirdo who keeps kicking you for no reason? We’ve all been there.
1. He plays with his hair.
Playing with your hair is a classic flirty move — it shows he’s feeling self-conscious and is eager to impress. If he’s massaging his own scalp with the dexterity of an aggressive concert pianist he’s definitely into you, and probably doesn’t even have nits. The more hair, the better. (If he’s bald, he’s not into you. Get over it already.)
2. He scratches his nose.
When a guy scratches his nose, he’s subconsciously trying to draw your attention to his face. You know why? Because his lips are on his face. Why are his lips important? Because he uses his lips to blow bubbles. Everyone loves bubbles.
3. He blinks.
Did he just close his eyes and open them again rapidly? He’s subconsciously so attracted to you that he can’t bear you to be out of his sight for more than a split-second. Doesn’t matter if he’s looking in a totally different direction, doesn’t matter if someone just splashed vodka in his eye, doesn’t matter if he’s begging you to go away and waving a restraining order in your face — if he’s blinking, you guys are sync-ing.
4. He wears a blue t-shirt on your first date.
Blue is a conservative shade which means your man is into traditional values and expensive schools. He wants to uphold good standards like fidelity, commitment, Sunday roasts and squash tournaments — and his careful dress sense shows he wants to do them all with you. Fasten your seat belts, this one’s taking you for a lifelong ride.
5. He doesn’t wear a blue t-shirt on your first date.
Wow, this guy’s unpredictable! Tearing away from traditional values, he’s full of surprises all the time. One moment the two of you are going for a candlelit date, the next you’re fighting crime or falling off a rollercoaster! Your man’s crazy dress sense shows his inner spontaneity has been ignited — by you. You’re on a lifelong ride with this one, so fasten your seatbelts!
6. He is good friends with a man called Jared.
This one is too obvious to need an explanation.
7. He breaks up with you.
Visiting, calling, texting, emailing, blood-red letters in eerie streaks across the mirror — they’re all ways to open up communication. Why would a guy go to all the efforts of breaking up with you when he could instead choose to sit in total silence and stare at the wall? Because he just can’t get enough of you, that’s why.
Now you can spot the signs, you’ll be able to spot your man in no time. So go get ’em, tiger!
Remember: these tips are tried and tested. If you go out tonight and a man isn’t interested after showing any of these signs, it’s because you’re a pathetic hopeless loser who will die alone and unloved. Okay bye!