You officially have work in less than two hours and the countdown begins.
Cleaned the fridge yesterday. Disaster.
If I do actually meet the end of my life in another shower incident, I want it to be absolute carnage.
Utter humiliation can be a cherished time in our lives. I’m only now realizing that.
Swiping right has exposed me to a whole range of human specimens.
“Quinoa!” my dad exclaimed. “The South Americans have been eating that for years. You people think you discovered it.” He looked at us in disgust. I looked at him in perplexity.
“Hey,” said my housemates two days ago. She was the first to crack. “Is it just me or is the toilet harder to flush?”
What if you ended up like your parents?
10.20am on a Sunday morning. Is there any time more appropriate for an overpriced plate of eggs?
Perhaps that is the solution. Make yourself feel guilty enough to stick with something.