“You are enough.” Those three words were everything I needed to believe.
As I sat on the dock, I looked out into the hazy midnight sky and blamed myself. For once, the busy lake was silent; I was left alone to wonder exactly what I was missing. Just as I began to pinpoint the flaws with my (not toned enough) body and (not confident enough) personality that made me somehow unlovable, I received this text:
Although she spent a full hour earlier that night telling me how wonderful, smart, hilarious, and attractive I am (aren’t best friends great?), I left her apartment unconvinced and exhausted. Only when my phone lit up and I saw her three simple words did I begin to rethink the assumptions I’d made about my own worth.
I started to accept that my inability to fix a heart I didn’t break says absolutely nothing about me, that someone else’s limited capacity for feeling doesn’t mean that I’m unworthy of affection.
This realization didn’t help with the heartache or the frustration, but it changed how I processed it. Rather than internalizing an external problem, I’m trying to accept myself as I am. Even if I don’t necessarily believe that I’m wonderful or smart or hilarious or attractive, I’ll accept that I’m loved and love to the fullest in return.
I’m growing to accept that I’m enough. Please believe that you’re enough too. You’ll sleep better; I promise.