1. You will party, every three months when you finally get a break in between your projects, papers, exams and homework. At that party, you will end up vomiting in four different places before the night is over.
2. People will call you antisocial. You will never be able to justify how busy you are to anyone. All of your friends, coworkers and family members go by the standard “If you aren’t with me, you’re obviously sleeping.”. You know this is wrong. You’re lucky to get 5 hours of sleep. Let it go, they will never believe you. Repeat after me.. “I have been sleeping for the past 4 years.”
3. You will begin to apologize often to people you do not know and who do not know you very well.
4. Your senior year, you will be involved in too much. You will spread yourself thin. You probably won’t stop.
5. You will start to think about the poor financial decisions you made by taking out a couple of extra thousand to blow on Spring Break with your friends. You will finally understand what interest rate means.
6. You will make lists. These lists will make you feel productive. You have not been productive by making a list. You need someone to tell you this and we are friends. So there.
7. After telling yourself over and over that you need to work every day in order to avoid taking out more loans, you will consider taking out more loans so you don’t have to work with those morons.
8. You won’t take out the loan; you will continue to work with those morons. Sorry.
9. You will take an online class because you are tired of going to campus. That online class will give you a Group Project. That group will constantly want to meet up on campus. You will go every time because there is a peer evaluation at the end.
10. Although you constantly feel stressed and overworked, you’re actually putting most of your energy into worrying and being stressed. Just do your homework, stop reading (writing for) Thought Catalog for an afternoon and do your shit.
Or don’t, I’m not your mother.