Remember To Appreciate Your First Love, Even If They Broke Your Heart

I still remember the first man I fell in love with. I was 21. So young and hopeful and in love with love. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that I ever loved him. Some days I look back on that relationship and wonder why I stayed so long. Other days I look back fondly and am happy that the first man who ever loved me was such a kind one.

After a breakup, it can be difficult to remember the good times and the reasons they made you happy. At the end of a relationship, things are often so bitter and angry that you forget you once laughed and thought the world of this person.

It took me a year to overcome the heartbreak that came with losing my first love. It was my decision to break up, but that didn’t make it any easier. I still agonized over the choice. Was it the right one? Should I have tried harder? Was this something I would regret for the rest of my life? I hated myself for being the one who hurt him in a way he had never been hurt before. It was necessary for me to cut him out of my life, and to this day I haven’t spoken more than 10 words to him in the past three years.

But that’s okay. I know he is happy. I know he is loved. I know he is achieving all of the things I wished for him when we were together. And for that I am eternally grateful. He is a good man. He just wasn’t the one for me.

See, he was the first man who ever really saw me. He was the first one who loved me in a way I will always appreciate. He told me I was beautiful every single day and made me feel like the most special person in the world.

I’ve changed so much since we were together, and I love the person I am today. I don’t talk to him anymore, but I hope he realizes how big of an impact he made on me and the expectations I have for love. It didn’t work out, but he helped shape what I want in a relationship and what I deserve, and that is something that I will carry with me for a lifetime. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Pasta enthusiast, book lover and Friends aficionado

Follow Stephanie on Instagram or read more articles from Stephanie on Thought Catalog. Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about page.