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All The Times I’ve Run Into My Failed OKCupid Dates

I saw Andy and his girlfriend again — they’ve probably been together for two or three years, at this point — they were crossing the street with huge backpacks on, the kind you travel with. I wondered if they were coming or going, and where, but didn’t ask or even say hi. I just mostly felt an empty hole where the jealous part of me should have been.

That One Time Nothing Ever Happened

He remained on the sidewalk, pacing back and forth. “They’re closed,” I’d report. “They can’t send someone for another two hours.” I’d called four or five locksmiths when one finally bit. “SOMEONE’S COMING!” I announced.

In Defense Of ‘Flakes’

If you care about someone, which is ostensibly the reason you’d want to hang out with them, wouldn’t you try to respect that sometimes they need to do what feels right for them, rather than what’s right for you?

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