Whether you’re just going on dates and getting to know prospective suitors, or you’re casually funking around, there’s no longer “just friends” and “in a relationship.” Before we attack Mark Zuckerberg for “it’s complicated,” let’s keep it simple! Here’s why to have the uncomfortable conversation about seeing other people.
1. Honesty is Attractive
Liars are a turn off. Most people would rather know that you’re seeing other people than feel betrayed by the misconception of your relationship (or lack of). On the other hand, being forward enough to maturely address that “hey, you’re great, but we’re just starting to get to know each other” shows that’s you’re confident and considerate.
2. You Have Standards
So what if you don’t swoon over every guy and girl you meet? Taking the time to actually get to know someone shows that you aren’t settling. If you do get to know each other better, and you can’t help but only want to be with one person, you both know that it was a truly undeniable attraction.
3. You Have Options
In those initial stages of dating someone new, too many people will play hard to get, but not be hard to get. If you have a little interest in more than one person before committing, it shows others have interest in you. Someone that has options is likable for a reason. Having options equates with not being “desperate;” links back to showing you have standards.
4. You Don’t Have to Read Each Others’ Minds
Sometimes, you just want to know what it is. Is she saying she’s too busy, but really just hanging out with other guys? Maybe she’s just too busy. Maybe she’s hanging out with other guys.
Is he playing up the same romance card with other girls? Maybe it’s just you after all. Rather than overthink every text message, every date, every conversation, know what it is that you want, and what you have.
5. It Takes the Pressure Off
As everyone slowly starts moving into apartments together, marrying off, and baby-making (not always in that order), some people do feel the pressure to find Mr. or Mrs. Right. Others are less in a hurry.
If you’re seeing more than one person and inclined to continue casually dating, neither party has to feel like they have to hold back in fear of giving the wrong impression.
6. If You Want Different Things You Can Move Forward
It’s selfish to lead someone on. If you’re not ready to commit, and the other person wants more, you can’t continue to be involved. A relationship of any sort, only works when both persons want the same thing.
7. It’s Safe
She said “I don’t want to ask him about whether he’s seeing other people because he might think I want to be his girlfriend. I just don’t want to catch anything.” Be safe! Birth control isn’t everything; you should be using condoms. If you’re not in a monogamous relationship, but one person thinks you are, it can be dangerous to your health. Both your sexual health and mental health can be at risk.