You Won’t Always Feel This Sad

I know it may not feel like it right now, but everything is going to be okay eventually. You won’t always feel like there is a hole in your chest. There are nights coming where you will fall asleep at peace instead of tossing and turning, wondering why you can’t shake this rain cloud.

I know some days it feels like there is no reason to open the blinds or turn on the shower. It can feel like all the bricks that have ever been thrown at you are still on your back, weighing you down. There might be times when simply looking at your own reflection in the mirror feels unbearable. You could feel like everything is spiraling and the world just can’t seem to slow down on its axis.

I know it’s hard. I know you don’t want to hear that it will get better, because it truly doesn’t feel like that could be even a fraction of the truth. When people tell you to look for a silver lining you just can’t believe their ignorance. Everything is so heavy and no one could possibly understand what it’s really like at the bottom of this ocean you’re in.

But it won’t always be this way.

One day the rainstorm will feel more like a drizzle. The clouds above will start to dissipate with the hopeful glow of coming sunlight. You will be able to look ahead and see brighter times without being reminded of how hopeless everything seems at this moment now.

It might be dark and gloomy right now, but I promise that you are going to get through it. The loss you feel, the heartache that haunts you, it won’t always sting like it does today. Your resilience is carrying you through whether you can see it now or not. Maybe you haven’t noticed it, but you have picked up pieces of armor throughout everything that seemed to keep going wrong.

You are stronger than you know. You may not be able to change what’s happening, but you are making your way through it one day, hour and second at a time.

The world is going to stop spinning. Your pain is going to steadily lessen its weight on your shoulders. Your happy reflection is just waiting patiently for you to look up and smile back. These scars may be yours to keep forever, but the fiery pain that left them will not last much longer.

You are going to see the good times. You are going to feel the victory of happiness again. Life is full of second chances and you have not run out of yours. Where you are today is not your final destination. You are going to make it.

I know it’s hard to keep grasping on to what seems like shallow hope. You’ve been let down so much in this life and having faith in anything probably feels like a pipe dream today. Don’t give up. That flicker at the end of the tunnel will soon turn into light that surrounds you.

You just have to hold on a little longer.

You won’t always feel this sad.

Talking to someone can save your life. If you need help right now, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741-741.

About the author
Colorado native, cult escapee. Follow Stephani on Instagram or read more articles from Stephani on Thought Catalog.

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