5 Little Things You Deserve To Learn Before You’re 21

life little things and turning 21
Priscilla Du Preez

1. Not everyone you are friends with now will be your friends in the future.

We worry about our friends. Some of us worry about the quantity. I can tell you this and you would probably see it now or in years to come that not everyone you are friends with will stay. People come and go. Not everyone you hang out with or meet will be the friends you are to keep. Why? Because people change and grow. Some grow apart and some closer. Some will treasure and some will see you as an opportunity for them to get to something better and then leave. Do not worry about the quantity of friends you have but instead, appreciate those who truly care about you and accept you as the person you are.

2. The meanest people are the ones that need kindness most.

I have mentioned this before and I will mention it again. The people that need kindness the most are often the meanest ones we know. This does not mean you have to be friends with them. Kindness does not start with you having to be a friend to a person for you to be kind. The likely reason for them being the way they are is that probably, not everyone around them is nice. Perhaps the environment they are in or grew up in. Hence, they do not quite understand what could hurt someone else’s feelings.

3. People will talk but don’t lose sleep over it.

People will always talk. Good or bad.This is not within your control. As it is, you can’t control their thoughts. If someone talks bad about you, it is not you that is the problem but the fact that they might be lacking something that you have. You are beautiful just the way you are. You should never lose sleep over someone’s words or someone.

If someone thinks you are boring and that all you ever talk about is school or something they can’t “connect” with, do not take it personally. We all have different interests and if they are going to hold that against you says a lot more about them than yourself. Do not feel that you have to be like them because often, these people are the ones that are trying to be like others so that people will like them.

If someone says that they do not approve of you, fuck it. You do not need anyone’s approval. You are your own person and you certainly do not need to get approval from someone to make others think you are amazing.

If someone is trying to make someone else change their perspective of you, do not be bothered of what the other person thinks. Do not also feel like that person should defend you. Retaliation is what the person that is speaking about you wants. If the person talks about you and the other listens let them, because trust in them that they know you better than the one that speaks about you. Often, the people that bring you up in a topic thinks they have figured you out but they have yet to know so much about you.

Do not restrict yourself because you worry of what people would say about you. Do you. Be you. Be happy. As long as you can go to bed at night knowing you did your best and you are contented with yourself, that is more than enough.

4. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, your true friends will understand why you did what you did.

True friends will understand your actions and why you did them. They will console and not judge or make you feel bad about yourself for doing so. You do not owe anyone an explanation because you did what you could to make a change for yourself because in that moment, that was the most important thing to you. Hence, the change happened. Knowing something was wrong and realising it, is the first step to anything for progress. True friends will trust you and know you are in control of what you are doing. If needed to, they will drop some guidance along the way. They will never make you feel bad about yourself or the things you do.

5. It is important to love yourself and be your own company.

I say this because most of us lack the love for ourselves. We fear being alone but we forget that we, ourselves can be our own company. Take yourself out. Bring yourself to a bookstore and discover new things. Treat yourself and indulge in food. Do not worry about things you can’t control. Embrace your beauty. You do not need someone to “complete” you. You are your own person and you deserve every bit of love you can get and receive. TC mark

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