1. We’re humble.
We’ve been through the ringer before and no matter how big an ego we thought we had or how confident we are in ourselves, when someone decides that we aren’t the one for him or her, it hurts. We realize that it’s better to find someone who accepts all of our faults and finds them cute and quirky. We don’t date thinking that we are invincible. We know there’s a delicate balance that requires give and take. We know we’re not perfect, but we’re ready to try something real.
2. We’re not made of stone.
Being heartbroken means we are capable of loving another human. We don’t sit in a relationship hoping to fall in love. We know what our potential is and seek it out with another. We won’t accept mediocrity, stepping on eggshells and something comfortable and safe.
3. We know what it’s like to be dumped.
We have first hand experience in getting broken up with and feeling despaired. We’re sensitive to the fact that you hold somebody’s trust in your pocket when you get serious with him or her. We will think twice and three times before settling down if only to spare you the pain that we’ve felt before and to make sure our foundation is rock solid.
4. We’re love veterans.
We have a better idea of what we want and what we know we can’t accept. We know what our deal breakers are. We know what draws us to people. What will ultimately send us away. Where we want to go and with whom we want to go. When we find someone that fills these criteria, we’re far more comfortable in moving forward.
5. You’ll get to see our vulnerable side.
Particularly if we choose to open up about our previous relationship and how we got our hearts stomped on. You’ll see how capable we are of being deeply committed and loving another person. You can help comfort us and swoop in where the last person failed us.
6. We’ll be better able to recognize when something feels right and when it doesn’t.
Love is a tricky thing. Sometimes you don’t know it’s there until it’s no longer yours to consider. When we’ve been rejected by a significant other, we may be blind to the warning signs. We’ll be much more vigilant the next time around and know how to identify an issue more quickly and assertively when something isn’t working.
7. We’re done with excuses – both accepting them and making them.
We don’t have time to constant doubts, flakiness and pining. If someone wants to be with us, he or she will make it happen. We are far more aware that the best relationships don’t require endless amounts of work. They shouldn’t suck the life out of and leave us with self-doubt.
8. We’re more open and honest about what makes us tick.
And what we can accept and what we can’t live without. We’re willing to ask for it, to seek it out and to recognize when it’s just not going to work.
9. Our scars are hidden, but keep us aware of the precious existence that is love.
We know that love is worth protecting, fighting for and stepping up to take. We’ve had enough of it to want more, but know it only works with the delicate balance of finding it with the right person and the right time.
10. We may seem tough at first, but it’s worth getting through our armor.
If we’ve been betrayed unexpectedly, we’ve weathered the battle of hurt, sadness, loneliness and skepticism. We may be harder to break down the next time around, but don’t give us on us. Once we let our guard down, you’ll have a keeper.
11. From every end comes a new beginning.
A new chance to appreciate the new adventures ahead. To understand that the past is a book from which to learn valuable lessons and from which to use those battle wounds as nuggets of wisdom for the next relationship.
12. If you haven’t loved and lost, you miss learning what it is to be consumed wholly by another person for a while.
We’ve been eaten up, swallowed and spit out only to be forced to become an independent functioning unit again. Once we realize that we can make it on our own and learn to live our lives again, we gain confidence in who we are and what we need. We’ll be much better partners because we choose to be with you, not because we need to be with you.
13. We’re more cautious with who we fall for.
Who we let fall for us and how much we’re willing to endure before calling it quits.
14. Our hearts, minds and bodies have been through the wringer and have come out stronger, healthier and more balanced.
We have a better sense of ourselves and what makes us tick. This will be infinitely more useful in finding a satisfying relationship that will last.
15. We’ve learned from our mistakes and strive to be a better listener, friend, lover and partner.
If we find someone to love again who loves in return, that’s just about the best thing we can ask for.