Thought Catalog

This Is Why You’re Still Alone, Based On Your Birth Month

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Girl standing in desert
Alexander Ramsey

January

When you’re actually in a relationship, you’re a very romantic and loving partner – it’s the falling in love part that you struggle with. You don’t know how to strike a healthy balance between your professional life and your personal life. And in addition to this, you also have a hard time opening up emotionally. So your issues with making space in your life for dating and love, combined with your hesitation to open up emotionally, makes it pretty understandable why you’re alone.

February

You don’t have any problems making friends, but you do experience challenges when it comes to calming down, focusing, and staying still long enough to focus on one person. You are always go-go-go, jumping from one thing in your life to the next. In a lot of ways, this is great for your life – it’s great for your career, for your dreams, for your passions and hobbies. But you don’t know how to reign in that aspect of your personality when it comes to dating – so instead of letting yourself slow down and fall for someone you really like, you just keep going from one person to the next, subconsciously afraid of ever letting anyone get close to you.

March

You’re so busy taking care of everyone else and trying to make everyone else happy that you forget to save some focus for your own happiness, too. You’re the sympathetic friend, the dependable one, the one who has a bottomless well of compassion for everyone you encounter. But when it comes to going after what you want (in love, but also in other areas of your life), you keep quiet, you hide your feelings, and you don’t let yourself fall.

April

Some people struggle with being afraid to fall in love at all, but you fall too fast. You have so much of yourself to give – so much love, and energy, and joy, and lightness – and that’s fantastic. But sometimes, you give it to the wrong people, the ones who don’t deserve it and the ones who will only take it for granted. You get addicted to the high of falling and are not careful about only saving your heart for those people who really deserve it, so you keep having to walk away from broken relationships with people who don’t deserve you.

May

Your drive, intelligence, and motivation are certainly the reasons why you’ve gotten so far in your life. But when it comes to love, these characteristics can lead you to sometimes looking at love as a game, as something you can control, and as something that must follow a specific set of rules. And this is when you get into trouble. You’re alone because you keep wanting to plan out every aspect of your love story, and to have a say in every quality and characteristic that you want your significant other to have, instead of letting yourself enjoy the experience of falling for someone you really care about, and learning how much you will look past certain ‘flaws’ or personality traits when you’ve found someone who truly loves you and cares about you.

June

You’re alone because you’re allowing your hurt and pain from previous experiences and relationships to keep you living in the past – instead of living in the present and looking towards the future. You’re a very sensitive person, and in most ways, that’s a wonderful and rare quality. But it becomes a problem when you let it negatively affect the choices you make – when you allow your hurt and sensitivity to keep you wallowing and obsessing over past pain instead of encouraging yourself to move on to someone who actually deserves what you have to give.

July

As friendly, well-liked, and approachable as you are, you absolutely struggle with being passive in your love life. Rather than being outgoing and warm like you usually are, when it comes to your love life, you continue to just sit back, stay quiet, and hope something will fall into your lap. You hesitate to put yourself out there and never do anything about it when you have feelings for someone, which is why you’re still alone regardless of how much people gravitate towards you.

August

Your natural inclination towards leadership is one of your best characteristics, except when it causes you to try to control your love life and your relationships. You tend to act rashly when something goes wrong in your relationships, because you’re scared of the fact that you can only control your own actions, instead of being able to control the entire situation. Until you learn to handle your fidgety pride and your stubborn desire for control, you’re going to continue being alone.

September

You have no problems with being confident and self-possessed – you know who you are and what you want in your life as a whole, including your love life. The issue comes from the fact that although you are gentle and encouraging with yourself, you can be very critical and judgmental of others. It’s important to have standards and to believe that you are deserving of someone great and kind and loyal, but that doesn’t mean you can spend your days trying to change your significant other into your idea of the perfect partner.

October

You are truly a rare breed – the type of person who is kind and genuine, without ever wasting too much time worrying about what other people think about you. But the reason why you’re alone is because you do let other people’s opinions have too much power over your love life and your dating choices. People can judge you or mock you all they want – you will continue getting over their stabs and continue being yourself. But when it comes to your significant other, you really too much on everyone else’s thoughts and everyone else’s approval, instead of just deciding yourself what’s best for you.

November

When you actually let someone in, you are an incredibly deep, loyal, and loving partner. So your issue comes from the actual letting-someone-in part of the dating experience. You have a sharp mind and a very lively energy, but you tend to pull back and harden your heart when someone really tries to get to know you on a deeper level. Until you realize that happiness and joy in love do not come from protecting your heart and keeping it at a safe distance, you will continue to be alone.

December

You are considered a great friend, coworker, and all-around lovely person to be around. You are light and playful with a great sense of humor. Your problem with love, however, is that you look at it too logically and too practically. It’s good to be conscious of the decisions you’re making and to think about what you want, but if all you’re ever doing is refusing to take risks, and waffling on decisions until you know every single fact, you’re not going to find your person. TC mark

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