It’s pretty crazy how you can look back at a year and realize how much time you actually invested, whether that’s into something or someone. For some, perhaps they spent too much time being unhappy in a job, or too much time dwelling on what’s happened in the past. For others, maybe it was about spending time and putting in more effort with loved ones or helping the less fortunate.
For me, though, most of the year was revolved around you. Me and you. Us. The moment I first met you, I was in awe. Infatuated, even. You inspired me to create myself, helping me to see the world differently, filled with beautiful thoughts and dreams. You cradled my heart ever-so-delicately—nurtured and protected, as if it were your own. Whether we walked through the park late at night or sat and ate pizza from the night before, the spark was constant. We were magnetic. I had never felt the feeling of being at home in a person before, never felt so safe, so warm. And maybe that is why it demanded to be felt.
But then things changed. It was as if our souls were still connected, that they knew that we were created by the same ocean, by the same star. They were desperate to be together. Unfortunately, life got in the way, making me realise that sometimes beautiful things have to come to an end, turning all that we had into a memory that will last forever. Months have passed, and even when life becomes chaotic and I think I’m over you, a photo of your smile finds its way in front of my eyes, or I’ll walk down the street on a busy Saturday afternoon and hear the laughter that once filled my body with huge amounts of ardor, only to turn around and see someone who isn’t you. Maybe we are supposed to be together years from now once we’ve grown up a bit, made some more mistakes and learned to love and accept our own selves just that little bit more.
And even if we’re not meant to be, I will be forever grateful for the time we spent together, grateful to have felt so much love. Grateful to have been seen.