1. You don’t feel appreciated
I think this is an important one that we sometimes put on the back burner because we feel like maybe we’re overreacting or asking for too much, but the truth is you’re not. Everyone needs to feel appreciated in a relationship, and this is done in so many ways. They can verbally express their appreciation or write it. They can reciprocate an act to show you their appreciation. They can hug you and hold you to show you they appreciate you. Once you start feeling underappreciated, you lose sight of what kept you in the relationship in the first place. If you express this need to your partner, and he/she doesn’t hear you or make the necessary effort, all you can do is keep trying…or let go.
2. You fight more than you can emotionally handle
I know it’s normal for couples to argue and fight; it’s normal for two people to disagree on more than one topic. It’s also normal for two people to have different communication styles that may or may not complement each other. But when it becomes an everyday thing, when you’re fighting more than you’re breathing, it’s time to sit back and analyze your relationship. Is this all worth it?
3. Your needs aren’t being met
That’s it. Your needs aren’t being met. If you’ve discussed this with your partner, and he/she makes no effort to change this, why stick around? What are you getting out of the relationship?
4. You’ve had numerous conversations, but nothing changes
Obviously everything on this list deserves a conversation or two or three or four before letting go completely. Love is always worth another try, but when you keep talking about the same issues, and there’s never any resolution, it becomes redundant and painstaking to constantly feel like you’re not being heard. Letting go will show your partner you’re not playing. You mean everything you say when you guys sit down to talk. And maybe letting go will make him/her realize that he/she really needs to make changes. Or maybe it’ll show him/her that they’re not ready for the relationship.
5. You feel completely lost
After putting all of this effort into making a relationship work, you feel lost. You feel isolated. You feel stupid. Because there’s nothing more in this world that you’d want more than just being happy with your partner, but it’s not happening, and it’s so confusing to you. You almost feel like you lost a part of yourself.
6. You’ve given more than you’ve ever received
The minute you start to feel this way, it’s so important to address this with your partner, because sometimes, they don’t even realize what’s happening. If that doesn’t work, it’s time to let go. You cannot be with someone who doesn’t give you what you also deserve. It’s also not humanly possible for you to love someone without ever feeling the effort back. You make all the plans. You call him/her all the time. You pick her/him up when you guys hang out. Your life is on hold until he/she gets theirs on track. You can’t sacrifice all that you deserve in a relationship. Your partner needs to meet you halfway or you need to let go.
7. You’ve compromised more than your partner
After all the talks you’ve had with your partner, if you find yourself being the one to constantly have to compromise and make changes for the relationship to work, you’re not in the right relationship. A relationship requires compromising on both ends. Not just yours.
8. You resent your partner
You resent your partner for so many reasons that you bicker and complain more, you keep more to yourself, and you stop doing the things you do for people you love because you feel like you’re being taken advantage of. Maybe you are. Let go. Don’t stay and make the other person miserable just because none of you have the balls to end it.
9. You stop seeing a future with your partner
Once you can no longer picture getting married to your partner, having kids with them, moving in with them, etc., then maybe it’s time to remove yourself from the relationship. Don’t let it drag on. It’ll only hurt you and your partner more in the end.
10. Your partner isn’t growing with you
If you feel like your partner is stagnant, and this is forcing you to be stagnant, and you’ve had conversations with him/her about it then you need to decide what’s best for you. Do you wait for your partner to decide to grow or do you grow on your own and at your own pace? I think you should always try to help your partner grow, but there’s only so much you can do. Some people enjoy being stagnant. Some people don’t like change. But that’s not you. Don’t change who you are or stop growing because of a relationship. Let go.