Loving you was explosive. It was fast but it was real. Everything we did we did with passion. We loved until we no longer knew what it meant to fall anymore. We touched until our bodies became numb to the sensation. We fought until others had to pull us off one another.
It started out with sparks, a little dim but still shining. We were so young and neither of us knew better. Our love was a drug. We so quickly became addicted to each other and the feelings that surfaced. Once it was time to get sober, neither of us could bear the thought of losing that high.
Because of you I no longer view the world with my rose-colored glasses. My old world was peaceful and filled with endless love for everyone. Now I look upon others and wonder what heart they have broken or if they too are healing from one of their own.
We were both sensitive to the touch but we ventured far beyond our comfort zones. You would tread lightly around me until the glass between us shattered and we became one.
How did we end up so far apart when we promised to always stay together?
I taught you how to breathe and in return you taught me how to ask for help. I guess two people who are both drowning shouldn’t teach the other how to swim. But I still miss you. I think a part of me always will. You were my first love, my first heartbreak. You were the feeling in the pit of my stomach for months after we broke up, the feeling that it was my fault we could not make it work. The feeling that I had let you slip through my fingertips. I thought you were the one.
I’ve tried loving others the way I used to love you but nothing compares. I search for parts of you in other people but it’s no use. I know we had to end, I know we were each other’s trigger points to an emotional break but when we were good, we were great. And when we loved, it was a kind that would have made Romeo and Juliet think twice.
Loving you was explosive. It was real and it was passionate. It burned bright and burned fast. Sometimes I think I can still see the smoke from our love but maybe my mind is just playing games with me.