In the modern-day dating world, it is one big conundrum to find a prince amidst countless frogs. Believe me, I have been right there with you beauties. For what felt like an eternity, I was searching high and low for a legitimate man in a world full of boys. I kept trying to find gold in garbage, totally blind to the fact that every man shows his true intentions rather clearly. Guys aren’t as wicked sharp as you may believe and actually let you know what’s up if you wake up and open your eyes. Yet, for some reason, it is easier to ignore the truth and fantasize. Darlings, when a guy shows you who they are, do yourselves a favor and listen to him. It took me twenty-five years of headache and serial dating madness and idiocy to finally stumble upon my current boyfriend, Leo. Now that I have reached this long awaited time in my romantic life, I realize just how different he treats me than the rest. Before my prince came knocking on my door, I desperately tried to find signs of boyfriend potential in everyone. A life-long hopeless romantic, I couldn’t accept the fact that someone wasn’t the right match for me or simply didn’t want anything real with me.
Every moment we have is sacred so please love yourselves enough to wait for the right guy who deserves your magnificence. Here are the ten signs that the guy you are courting is the real deal:
1. Intuitively speaking, you will feel good about the dynamic.
It won’t bring forth feelings of confusion, nausea, heartache, self-doubt, or anything else that isn’t soul-nourishing and positive. Stop mistaking these kinds of ill, dampening feelings for love! Once you sense that something is off and your mind and body are speaking to you, just drop it and move on to someone who lightens you up.
2. He will take you out on real dates.
And no, Netflix and chill doesn’t count nor do Skype dates. Let’s not kid ourselves now. Yes, maybe on date ten, but first he has to knock your socks off and court you like the princess that you are. No excuses.
3. You will know that he likes you because he will show it through his actions and not empty words.
Those are meaningless unless they are supported by corresponding blood, sweat, and tears on your part. He needs to be there for you, not just do the talk. That is cutting corners and you would be leaving reality and living in la la land by buying into his crap. F*uck that.
4. He will stop online dating shenanigans.
As a matter of fact, he will do so without your request because he respects you and isn’t open to alternatives. If he is still on a ton of online dating sites or apps after you two have discussed or established exclusivity, that is shady and shouldn’t be mistaken for mystery. Block out his excuses and just know that he is not as committed to you as he may say he is. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be scrolling through other chick’s profiles. Plain and simple.
5. You will not be hidden from his friends, family, or anyone else for that matter.
I understand if the two of you would like to maintain some form of privacy, but the guy who really takes you seriously will want to show you off. Transparency is key. If you sense that is he is trying to maintain his singledom and is only taken when in your presence, that is a sign right there that he is unsure, shaky, or cowardly. Get out before he breaks your heart.
6. He’ll treat you like the goddess that you are.
That means he will not take you for granted or play games with your heart. In essence, when a man cares about you and is a keeper, your pain will be his pain and he won’t bear to disrespect you or tarnish your spirit in any way. If you see any signs that he gets a kick out of hurting you or disrupting your peace, that is a huge red flag to give him the middle finger and go on your merry way to someone who deserves you.
7. The true, real deal will challenge you to evolve but not at the expense of changing you into somebody you are not.
In fact, the two of you will be on equal ground and aspire to grow to new lengths as a team. There is no separation! You will know if he is treating you like some kind of moldable barbie doll he can shape anyway he wants. That is unacceptable and a sign that he is placing conditions on keeping you in his life and disempowering you as a result. If he showcases this behavior, bid him farewell and keep your integrity intact.
8. The guy that is right for you will not lie.
He will want to share things with you and be an open book, at least 99% of the time. I understand if he is a faulty human being and spews out a white lie here and there, just as you might as well. There is a difference between purposely lying for the sake of lying and mistakenly leaving out something you might care to know. I used to have an ex-boyfriend who was a pathological liar and for some reason, I kept letting him off the hook. I don’t care what this guy’s explanations are as they are all BS and you don’t need to have this type of relationship. It is not your job to fix him or beg for the truth. Liars are usually crazy anyway. Next.
9. He will be consistent.
He won’t be an indecisive coward who is on one minute and off the next. It is either a yes or no dude! You aren’t the type of girl who waits around for a guy to make a decision about whether or not you are the one for him. You deserve someone who totally wants you and makes that clear through his unending, constant steadiness. Leave this unpredictable douche before he disappears for good, trust me.
10. A man that is deserving of your attention and admiration will be emotionally and mentally stable.
He will have emotional intelligence and be easy to communicate with. It is no fun dealing with someone who has a ton of unresolved issues that he sucks you into. Drama is not that fun when it’s an everyday affair. These types of relationships are frighteningly draining and will leave you gulping for air. So, look for men who are pretty simple and straightforward. Complex and dark isn’t the way to go. Say deuces before it’s too late and the damage has been done. I wish I had! So, there you have it. Those are the top ten signs that the man you are dating is the real deal! Do yourselves a favor and don’t settle for anything less than you are worthy of. Life is awfully short and there is no time for throwing away your time or energy on guys that aren’t worth it. Good luck finding love! In the meantime, keep slaying it girls!