We are delusional about love in many ways. For starters, we want instant gratification. We want short cuts, we’re looking for the first and easy way out everywhere.
But romance, my darling, was not meant to be easy and if it’s easy it isn’t romance!
One often gets asked about their idea of romance, the answer is as straight forward as it is twisted.
Romantic dinner dates, elaborate proposals, worldly declarations of love, promise rings, flowers and the pinks and the reds are the ideals of romance and that’s dangerous for a number of reasons.
One, it is mere convenience, and two, none of these above mentioned ideals of romantic gestures are long lived. Forget eternal.
Gestures hold meaning only if there is substance under their surface. There is no charm without a soul and there is no romance without a stamp of eternity.
Getting past the fancy three-day wedding affair or a perfect three-hour date sounds dreamy but getting old together and having a good laugh over his falling dentures and still being able to see all the stars of the sky lighting up his eyes as he sees you smile, now that’s my kind of a fairytale.
At the risk of sounding cliché, real romance requires patience, endurance, courage, perseverance and hard work and takes much more than just candle lights, flowers and a few hours of planning. Being completely besotted by your significant other means giving a part of you to someone every passing second; giving that much of your soul and thoughts to someone with every breath is what it takes to be romantic. No longer will the few days of planning for making a ‘romantic gesture’ impress someone whose ideals of romance are measured from a scale of infinity to eternity.
If this sounds like having high standards, one should happily embrace being accused of high standards rather than falling prey for this mediocrity.
Out of the many events of life which need to be rehearsed and planned, romance should definitely not be one of them.
Let it be what it was always supposed to be, raw, unadulterated and organic.