What Women Wished You Knew About Eating Pussy

In which we discuss the real reality of eating pussy.

A lot of guys are terrible at eating pussy.

How do I know?

Women tell me, often.

After going down on them, they say,

“Wow. OK. Most men have no idea what they’re doing. That was refreshing”.

Not all the time of course. But often enough to know it’s a problem.

Why are men so bad at it?

Either because they don’t like doing it, or they have no idea what they’re doing.

Don’t despair gentlemen (and women who want to get better at eating pussy) read on to find out how to upgrade your pussy eating skills in five simple ways.

Not Gonna Lie, I Love Eating Pussy

I do. I’ve eaten a lot of pussy over the years.

It sounds vulgar when you put it that way, but it is what it is. Why pretend like I don’t love going down on women?

If you’ve been sexually active for 20 years, there’s a good chance you’ve either eaten a lot of pussy or sucked a lot of dick.

Hopefully, you’re good at it by now. Some of you are, more of you aren’t.

I can count on one hand the times when I haven’t gone down on my partner before having intercourse with her.

That’s great for my lovers because women love oral sex. They do. They go nuts for great oral sex.

But bad oral sex? No one likes bad oral sex.

Life Is Too Short For Bad Pizza (And Bad Sex)

Someone once said that sex is like pizza. Even bad pizza is good and the same goes for sex.

I couldn’t disagree more.

Ain’t nobody got time for bad pizza or bad sex. That includes bad oral sex.

At best it’s just meh, and at worst it can hurt and completely ruin the moment.

No thanks. That’s a hard pass for me.

When Is Comes To Orgasms And Doors, Ladies First

Eating pussy is the most efficient way I’ve found to make a woman orgasm.

It’s pretty much a universal truth. Look it up.

Women reach orgasm quicker and more often from oral sex than from penetrative sex.

Most women can’t orgasm from penetration alone. There has to be some clitoral stimulation either before or during penetration for an orgasm to happen.

I like it when my partners’ orgasm.

I try to make sure they orgasm before I orgasm.

When men ejaculate, their desire to continue having sex decreases significantly. The same applies to me, so if my partner wants to orgasm, you know I’ll be eating her pussy first.

I digress.

Keep in mind; this isn’t a step by step guide.

That’s coming soon, and you’re not going to want to miss it.

In the meantime, enjoy these five steps to making you better at eating pussy.

1. Take Your Time Eating Pussy

Go slow, in everything you do.

That means foreplay and lots of it.

I love foreplay.

It turns me on and cranks my partner’s arousal up significantly.

It’s a win-win because women rarely get enough foreplay. Men tend just to stick it in and forget all about the foreplay. I’m not saying there isn’t a time and a place for a quickie, but those moments are few and far between.

Take time exploring your partner’s body.

Explore everything.

Her back, her thighs, the back of her knees, the nape of her neck.

Every single body part.

Try to lick and kiss every part of her body.

Except for her pussy.

Try to stay away from the pussy as much as possible. You can graze her outer lips or brush up against her bush, but under no circumstance are you to touch her pussy for at least 20 minutes.

It’s a great way to get her riled up and to remind you to concentrate on other parts of her body.

Her pussy isn’t the only erogenous zone. Find five areas that drive your partner wild, and remember them for next time.

The slower you go, the crazier she’ll get.

Once she’s writhing and thrusting her pussy at you, that’s a great indicator that she’s dying for you to lick her.

2. Get Comfortable Eating Pussy

Women take longer to reach a peak state of arousal than men do.

If you care about your partner’s pleasure, and you know that most women can’t reach orgasm through penetration alone (no matter how awesome you think your dick is) that means settling in for more than five minutes of eating pussy.

Set yourself up for success and get cozy as fuck.

You don’t want to be scrunched up on all fours, or halfway falling off the bed.

Ask your partner to scoot up on the bed and to orient herself on a diagonal so that you can cozy up between her legs without falling off the bed.

The more comfortable you are, the better off you’ll be.

3. Pay Attention

Not sure how to tell if what you’re doing is working? Curious if your partner is getting turned on? Wondering if they’re getting close to orgasm?

Pay attention to your partner because she’s most likely giving you all the information you need to know.

Pay close attention to how she moves her body.

Is she subtly rotating her hips with your timing?

Is she thrusting into your mouth to meet your tongue? Is her skin is getting flushed?

Is she moaning?

Is her clitoris getting swollen?

Is she getting wet?

Can you see moisture dripping from her pussy?

Is she grabbing your head and holding it to her pussy and yelling “DON’T STOP.”

Great work. Keep it up, and you just might make your partner an incredibly happy woman.

Whenever you do something different, whether it’s increasing the tempo, pressure, direction, or adding some stimulation (playing with her nipples, inserting fingers into her vagina, putting pressure on her mons pubis) it’s important to notice whether this change has a positive effect on her arousal.

Did she pull away slightly when you increased the pressure of your tongue on her clitoris?

Did she stop moaning when you changed from putting constant pressure on her g-spot to sliding your fingers in and out?

Did she say “don’t do that” when you tried to slide your finger in her anus without asking her permission?

These are all possible signs (except that last one, that’s a definite sign) that whatever you’re doing doesn’t feel great.

Pay attention. Look at her face. Look at her chest. Pay attention to her breathing. Listen to her moaning. Notice how she moves her body.

Is she clutching the sheets?

She’s giving you almost all the information you need. You just have to look for the signs.

4. Use Your Words

I’m not a mind reader. And nor are you.

While I’ve gotten better at identifying the nonverbal signs, nothing beats talking to your partner while going down on them to know if what you’re doing is working.

I’ve developed some techniques that I routinely employ to bring pleasure to my partners, but everyone is different. What might feel fantastic to one woman might not to another.

Being able to talk about sex is a huge turn on. Plus it’ll get you the information you need to help your partner achieve orgasm.

“Does this feel good?”

“Do you prefer constant pressure on your G Spot, or do you like the in and out motion?”

“Do you like a circular motion on your clitoris or more of an up and down motion?” “Should I use the flat part of my tongue or the tip of my tongue? Here, let me try both and tell me which you prefer”.

Women are turned on by men who can effectively talk about sex while having sex.

The best way to find out if what you’re doing is working is to ask.

Experts don’t guess.

5. Don’t Quit Before The Miracle Happens

Women are different then men. You can’t just hammer the clit to orgasm the way you hammer your cock.

Women take longer to reach a state of arousal and to reach orgasm.

When you’re eating pussy, settle in. Get comfortable, have fun, take it slow, and don’t stop until your partner asks you to stop.

Often the miracle orgasm is right around the corner, and if you don’t rush it, you’ll have a much better chance of helping your partner reach orgasm.

And for God’s sake, when your partner yells “don’t stop” whatever you do, don’t stop. Don’t change a thing. If your tongue gets sore and your neck starts to crick, suck it up and keep going.

In fact, don’t stop eating her pussy until she physically pulls your face off her pussy, or says “you can stop now” or “I’d like you to fuck me now please.”

Until one of those two things happen, don’t stop.

Remember The Big Gun

I’ve learned a lot about how to please women over the years, especially with my hands and my mouth.

But I still always fall back on using the most effective tool of all, my words and my ability to listen to find out exactly what my partner wants and how I can help.

The best way to eat pussy is slowly, with no agenda other than to bring pleasure to your partner.

If your partner is capable of having a clitoral orgasm through oral sex (not all women can) and your skills are on point, you’ll make her day (and maybe her week depending on how many useless pussy eaters have come before you). Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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