For The Girls Who Are Sick Of Being Texted And Not Wooed


When they send you “wyd”,

This letter is to all of you lurking eyes emoji using, “wyd” asking, hey yous, sending unsolicited dick pics, sliding into DMs like its your job men of today’s society. How about using your words to formulate a proper greeting, instead of emojis, pictures acronyms or ebonics? We are too grown, too educated [however formal or informal that may be] and too experienced to speak in less than 120 characters. This isn’t an AOL chatroom in the early 2000s where it was socially acceptable for everyone to ask A/S/L. After all, we had very limited time to use that dial-up before Mami came and unplugged the telephone line from the computer because she needed to make a phone call—so it was crucial to get as much information as we could in what seemed like a brief amount of time “meeting people online.”

I get it, times have changed and technology has taken over our lives whether we want to welcome it with open arms and embrace the changes that are comin’ or not, they’re here! This doesn’t give you the right or the excuse to forget your manners, forget your upbringings or forget the simple fact that you have a grandmother, mother, aunt, cousin or sister in your life whom you love, respect and care for deeply and would never want to see disrespected, hurt or insulted.

Keep that in mind every time you think its okay to approach me or my sisters in whatever manner you feel might get you the quickest lay to add to your list or “body count.”

Most of us are either enjoying what we have left of our youthful 20s, some are already embracing the joys of their 3rd decade of life on this beautiful earth. Don’t you think its time to take a step back and maybe take a different approach in a direction that’s going to enhance and build your future versus one that’s going to build your reputation or sexual resume?

I’m not being bitter, this isn’t a feminist manifesto, we aren’t burning bras and chanting how much we hate men because at the end of the day its not true [can’t speak for all of us though].

I’m just asking for you to start a conversation with me, preferably offline, away from your phone, and not have your fingertips do the talking for you.

Instead, ask me out on a date—a simple one at that. Less is always more. I don’t care for “$200 dates”, besides I’m a picky eater and they probably won’t have something I like on the menu. Take me out for ice cream, let’s take a walk and get to know each other. Let’s make eye contact, make me laugh! Tell me about your childhood [not too much though because I’ll begin to psychoanalyze you and figure out everything that’s wrong with you and all the reasons why I shouldn’t try and fix you]. Kidding! No, but I might…well maybe a little.

Let’s have meaningful conversations, tell me about your goals. Listen to what I’m passionate about, what makes me tick and why I put up a tough exterior but I’m really mush on the inside. You just want to fuck? Cool, let me know from the very beginning. [Reminder: use your words!] Things will flow a lot smoother for both you and me, the quicker we both know where we stand or lay…again kidding! I’m not saying to propose to me week 2, but don’t waste my precious time or yours by pretending to build something that you don’t want, aren’t “ready” for or just genuinely aren’t interested in. I won’t be heartbroken, I won’t bash you on social media, but I will lose respect for you, which to me is probably worse than anything else.

So the next time you see an attractive female online, think twice about your form of approach. You never know what’ll happen; who knows something positive and beautiful may actually come of it.

Don’t send me your dick pics…yet Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Dominican-American young woman from the concrete jungle trying to figure life out one mistake, experience, sarcastic joke and day at a time.

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